What's the Physics behind Good Bagel making ? YES !!! ...the Doughy Disc



In the cosmic flex of gastronomy, there exists a celestial creation that overrides borders, cultures, and possibly, even galaxies — the humble bagel. 

Picture this: on a distant star called Mintaka, beings from the Orion constellation might one day send a transmission asking....3 of 1, 3 of 1 IAM, 

"What's your planet of current residence best contribution to the universe?" 




Without missing a beat, me, IAM also popularly know in Orion as 3 of 1 or IAM will instantly, without hesitation, with my current Afrikan eyes closed  imitating humorously  the distorted facial expression of an apostolic religious fanatic or zealot declare,

 ( not that IAM a fanatic of  any religious conviction, this is  just a figure of speech ,please ) 

 "Their bagel, dear Orion, these Huemans and their Humans, OH MOTHER OF GODS, OMGGG their bagel!"


Legend has it that bagels, those round delights with a hole in the middle, were a gift to humanity from ingenious Hebrew minds. 

Now, imagine a universe without bagels. A sad, bagel-less existence where intergalactic meetings lack the aroma of freshly baked goodness. It's a reality we dare not fathom.




Our gratitude to the bagel creators knows no bounds. We're so indebted that the next time Orion contacts us, bagels will be on the negotiation table. "Dear Orion," we'll say, "you might have advanced technology and warp drives, but have you tried a New York-style bagel? It's a game-changer."





Now, let's delve into the science behind this doughy marvel. Contrary to popular belief, the secret ingredient isn't New York City water, although we won't deny its mystical properties. The real magic happens in the kitchen, where dough is treated with the reverence usually reserved for ancient scrolls.

According to culinary wizard Richard Coppedge, a "true bagel" undergoes a cosmic transformation. The dough, left to ponder its existence in a refrigerator for days, achieves enlightenment. It's a process called retarding, where yeast activity slows down, creating a doughy symphony of flavour.




But the pièce de résistance is the boiling. The chilled dough, akin to a spa day for carbs, takes a dip in a jacuzzi of water and malt barley. This isn't just a bath; it's a ritual, a baptism that transforms the bagel into a chewy sensation. It's like bagel alchemy — turning simple ingredients into a gastronomic masterpiece.

Why boil, you ask? Well, because we're not mere mortals satisfied with shortcuts. Boiling pre-gelatinizes the starch, locks in the liquid, and thickens the crust. It's bagel alchemy — turning simple ingredients into a gastronomic masterpiece. 

Some might call it unnecessary; we call it bagel enlightenment.




Sure, modern bakers skip the boiling, opting for a quicker, automated method. But as bagel enthusiasts, we stand firm. We embrace the traditional, the chewy, the bagel that's been on a spiritual journey in a refrigerator.




So, dear readers, let's raise our bagels high and toast to the Hebrew minds who gifted us this doughy delight. And who knows, maybe one day, the bagel will be the bridge that unites planets and civilisations. 

After all, nothing says peace like breaking bread, or in our case, breaking bagels.



IAM OLOFIN - 3/ MITU

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